Understanding the nature of human communication and talking

This is an amazing topic. It has never occurred to me before this assignment: “ Why do we talk?” As I read through these chapters, there is an illumination and more understanding of this question after reading this book. We are engaged in talking to each other every time without thinking about the question. More so, this book shows the motives behind my communication with people and explaining the purpose of communicating with each other. One of the things I discovered about communication is that my intentions of talking with people depend on the kind of people, their mood, the environment we are in, availability of the time and the responses I am getting from them. Just has Klosterman says “ When asked a direct question, it’s human nature to respond”.

To say the fact, must we respond to everything?” Some questions are not to be answered. They are to be ruminated on. But many times, we give the answer and later regret and say, “ I shouldn’t have or should have answered in this way or that way. It happens to me sometimes also. I remember when I was young, I was very reserved. I seldom talked. All I knew was I didn’t like getting into a conversation with people. Maybe because I discovered that some people want to talk to me especially when something happened so as to use it as “ evidence of defendant”. I was so sensitive to everyone around me.

One day, at the family meeting, everyone was talking except me. “ I was seating quietly as if all that they were saying has no value to me. Then, one of my Uncles pointed to me and said, “ I am afraid of this boy and we all need to find something to do about him because we don’t know what is in his mind. He has never spoken a word since. That’s his attitude. I was scared by this statement. I also knew I wasn’t doing the right thing by being quiet with everyone. From that day I determined to chance because I was afraid of myself also and I did. It didn’t happen in a day though. It was a gradual process though. I discover I need to open my mouth and talk. An adage says “ A closed mouth is a closed destiny.”

Could you imagine now I do the same thing people did to me when I was very quiet? I stay away from people who refuse to talk. Especially, those who just smile at your question and never answer. You don’t know what is in their minds like Klosterman says and I quote, “ you can never trust a person who doesn’t talk much, because how else do you know what they’re thinking?” I agree this kind of people cannot be trusted. Another reason I discover is that people talk to each other in order to get information or gain more knowledge about something or someone. Communication like this is about the transfer of information in a learning environment. Example: Teachers and student. You can only be limited to your environment and what you know if you don’t ask those who have information about it. Some knowledge will not be acquired if there is no sharing of information. We gain more experience through sharing or communicating with other people.

Moreover, relationships are built through verbal communication. As friends, family or coworker, we need each other to progress and succeed. When we talk to each other, praise each other, correct each other, smile, laugh or cry together, we grow stronger in our relationship to each other. I cannot imagine a home, friendship, or place of work where there is no communication. That relationship is set up for separation. It will not last. Imagine spouses, who don’t talk to each other, the divorce is definitely knocking at the door. There must be constant consistent verbal communication between the spouses, children and their parents, intimate friends unless there will always be a problem. No relationship can exist with verbal communication. The structure of the human being is not to remain dormant but to socialize.

Talking to people is a means to lessen the burdens of our hearts or the hearts of others. Emotions are express, burden lifted and pain shared many times. “ Why does McNamara feel the need to talk to Klosterman or to anyone at this point in his life? Because there’s a very strong human desire to do so.” At the same time, I believe that is not everyone you open the door of your mouth to in the name of “ relationship”. We have to be careful who we share important and personal information with.