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Time-out method for behavior control essay

Time out is defined as an enforced time alone that is used as a result of behavior which is unwanted.

Time out method of behavior control is used by parents as a form of discipline. This method of behavior control has been accepted by parents over the ages because they take it as a sensitive and humane way of instilling discipline in children. This is because it appears to cause to cause less injury compared to yelling, spanking or hitting.

Whereas this method is considered as an effective means of settling boundaries with children in preschool, it can be deceptive since immediate behavior can be controlled and extinguished. The use of this method has been suggested by early childhood experts as a means of setting boundaries with children in preschool. Other psychologists and educators state that time out method may not be innocent as it is thought and may be a harmful way of installing discipline to children who are toddlers (Richard, 2003, p. 19). This time out method has even been listed by the National Association for the Education of Young children together with other methods like blaming, shaming, punishing and criticizing as disciplinary measures that are harmful to young children. At a critical point of view, time out method is seen as an authoritative method which can only work in children who are trained how to obey the authority and power of adults. Children that are not brought up in this way are seen to disobey the rules given to them by their elders.

For example, take a situation where a parent tries to close the door by force so that the son stays inside the house. Both the parent and the son struggle pushing the door in opposite directions. The parent becomes frustrated, feels foolish and finally gives up. The parent later looks at this scenario and laughs, he realizes that he is able to reason unlike the son hence decides never to use force. According to this incidence, the child views time out as punishment or even not being loved and being abandoned (Cohen, 1996, p. 24). Children who are below the age of seven are not able to interpret words like adults. Therefore, when they are ignored or isolated, they think that nobody seeks their attention and they therefore turn to be unlovable or even aggressive.

On the other hand, when they are not shown love but are attended to, they do not feel rejected. Withdrawing love from a child can be very traumatizing. This is because the child develops resentment, low self esteem, anger and confusion.

Behavioral control through time out method may lead to humiliation and embarrassment more so when child is together with the other children. This therefore shows that young children need to have a deep sense of safety psychologically. Children therefore develop this safety when he is able to trust people, respond to them positively and is helped to make sense in what he experiences. Withdrawing love and attention from a child for the purpose of controlling the child may therefore not help in instilling discipline to that child but rather a conflict resolution skill which may not be of any help. Instead, it affects the way they interact with their spouse, coworkers or even friends (Walter, 2000, p. 61).

Time out method is therefore an undesirable practice due to various reasons like; Young children are often confused by indirect relationship between actions and consequences. A normal child does need to circulate the mind by insisting on a time out table. Cognitive similarity between sitting on that table and allowing another child to sit on the same table is not only obscure but also confusingWhen an adult is present and shows attention to a child helps him by solving problems that keep on occurring. Authoritative control of a child’s behavior affects the way the child builds his internal control and his autonomous problem solving capability is also affected. This makes the child feel inadequate when solving his conflicts. When timeout method is used repeatedly, it negatively affects self-worth and self confidence development of a child.

This makes the child believe that his own feelings and desires are of little value compared to those of the adult. A child’s needs are not meet when the adult imposes a child to a time out method nor does it teach the alternative strategies to a child. Children can have the necessary amount of control by being given several chances to make decisions and choices but on the other hand a child may be confused by being given too many choices. Children under the age of four are able to manage language complexities this is because their ability to speak out their needs is limited.

Caregivers who are responsive are able to verbally interpret the similarity between a child’s action and the response of the other person. Toddlers are usually proud and only the world from their own point of view. For example, children may not see the need of saying sorry since they may not even understand its importance. When they are forced to say sorry they may not really mean and this may only contradict their feelings.

This may even make them be irresponsible for the action they do (Jeffrey, 2003, p. 43). Toddlers are also likely to be confused when they are to take turns and share something or even when told to use their words. This is because they do not understand the meaning of a word hence they respond by giving you a blank look. Therefore they do not understand the abstractions of language. Responsive caregivers should therefore regulate what the child is doing and is able to understand. When a child is taught how to conform to an adult’s, demands this does not resolve their deeper issues, instead they become more violent.

Adults should therefore encourage children to express their deeper feelings. This not only proves healthy but also important to the caregiver by enabling him learn the child hence preventing unwanted behavior from occurring. To hold a child who is out of control may be easier than silencing him. This is because holding the child not only creates safety but also encourages expression of true feelings and also strengthens the child- parent bond.

In most cases, children need more love and attention when they least deserve it. In guiding children it is easier to use a positive approach for giving them what they want instead of hindering them from taking what they want. Getting down to the level of children , making eye contact and empathizing equally with all children involved in a conflict makes the feel that you take their social conflict seriously. You should be clear when explaining to a child your expectations and boundaries. It is important to look for the underlying feelings and needs of a child in order to be able to understand why they behave in a particular manner.

To redirect your child’s behavior is easier and to look for acceptable alternatives, giving reasons and information or demonstrate how you want your child to behave. It is also important to be consistent and able to predict your limits. Children should be given appropriate time in order to be able to process the information then act on it. They should be given a chance to try again and also given choices rather than commands. Expression of parental love prevents the aggressive action of a child whereas parental time out enables the parent to regain good judgment and sense of composure (Gert, Bruyn, 2005, p. 48). It has been proven that there is no quick and easy method when trying to solve a conflict with a child. Isolating children or withdrawing love from them in order to teach them how to behave may not be necessary.

It is easier to teach children how to become co-operative and descent without controlling them or issuing them with any kind punishments or rewards. It is therefore important to train a child that each issue that comes up is unique and can be solved and at the same time giving them the respect and love they need. This method can only be of use when the parent is able to control himself since he has a higher reasoning capacity compared to the child. Time out method of behavioral control in children can be effective when used with other parental tools; this creates a good relationship between children and their parents (Jeffrey, 2003, p. 52). ReferenceCohen Albert (1996) Deviance and Control.

New York, Prentice Hall, pp. 24Gert Kroes & Eric Bruyn (2005) The Impact of the Big Five Personality Traits on Reports of Child Behavior Problems by Different Informants. Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, Vol. 33, pp. 48Jeffrey Snarr (2003) Making Faces: Testing the Relation between Child Behavior Problems and Mothers’ Interpretations of Child Emotions Expressions. Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, Vo.

31, pp. 43, 52Richard  Edmond (2005) The Psychological Process of Child Behavior Control. London, Routledge, pp. 19Walter Perrig (2000) Control of Human Behavior, Mental Processes, and Consciousness.

London, Lawrence Erlbaum Associates, pp. 61

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