Theme: relationships

Theme: Relationships Sub-theme: Divorce Article 1: Causes and Effects of Divorce Name of Author: Ashwini Ambekar (January 12, 2009). Causes and Effects of Divorce Retrieved on 20 February 2011, from http://www. articleswave. com/divorce-articles/causes-and-effects-of-divorce. html Article 2: Causes and Effects of Divorce Name of Author: Melissa Strouth ( March 22, 2010). Causes and Effects of Divorce Retrieved on 20 February 2011, from http://ezinearticles. com/? The-Cause-and-Effect-of-Divorce&id= 3956864 Article 1: People often dream of a fairy tale romance and get married to what they believe are their soul mates. Stories however do not always have beautiful endings. The number of individuals opting for divorce has been steadily increasing over the past few years. Some problems in the marriage can be resolved through variety of ways including counseling but sometimes the only solution to living happily is by parting ways. While the exact reasons for divorces cannot be completely determined it has been observed that in recent times more numbers of women have been initiating divorce as compared to men. Some common causes of divorce include: Money Couples often end up having disputes over money. In many cases one of the partners is invariably not happy with the spending habits of the other individual. This can result in massive fights. That money is a contentious issue among couples can be seen from the fact that opinion polls indicate as many as ninety percent respondents reporting fights over money. Likewise over 34% couples indicated that money was one of the major problems. Alcohol and Substance Abuse Any form of substance abuse can put a terrible strain on a relationship as substance abuse is often followed with abusive behavior. Many people cannot put up with the addictive behavior of their partners and this causes divorce. Sexual Problems Improper and problematic attitudes towards sex also results in problems within the marriage and this is responsible for eventual divorce. Infidelity in particular has been responsible for breakdown of many relationships and marriages. Immaturity and Jealous Attitude Immaturity on part of one of the partners and placing excessive demands on the partner are also some of the causes of divorce. Violence The actual figures of marital strife, abuse and violence in marriage are not completely known but studies indicate that around five percent of the marriages experience domestic abuse and this is one of the causes of divorce. In-Laws Many younger couples complain about too much meddling and involvement of their in-laws in their lives. There are also complains of excessive demands of the in-laws on their time and this puts a strain on the marital relationship. Myth of a Fairy Tale Relationship Many times people have unrealistic expectations from marriage and what it is supposed to be like and when this distorted view is not realized, it results in divorce. Lack of Communication Lack of communication is also one of the common causes of divorce. Because of lack of communication people are unable to resolve problems and issues that occur within the relationship and the conflicts can in the end cause tremendous strain on the relationship. Irrespective of whether divorce is mutually agreed upon or a contested one it can be a terrible blow to both the individuals. Divorce can never be an easy affair and effects of divorce on the individuals involved include depression and stress. However there are some positive effects of divorce particularly where the two individuals are involved in a very acrimonious relationship. Divorce in such a case can actually help the individuals to get their lives sorted out and find happiness on their own without being saddled in an unhealthy relationship. Effects of Divorce on Children 1) Research has indicated that children belonging to high conflict homes actually fared much better after a divorce between their parents. However children belonging to low conflict homes did not fare well if the marriage ended in divorce. This is perhaps because children growing up in low conflict homes did not see their parents fighting and therefore a break up and consequent divorce was a huge shock to them. 2) Children seeing their parents’ divorce often feel scared about what will happen to them. They also worry about their family and what would happen to them in the future. If one parent leaves the house then they worry about that parent and whether they would get to see that parent again. 3) Many children often blame themselves for the divorce though this is usually unfounded. Sometimes children are singled out and often blamed by parents for the divorce and that does not help the cause. 4) Some children suddenly become withdrawn and quiet or aggressive and upset. The anger can be because of the changes in the life of the children. Frustration also sets in because of these changes. 5) Children often feel lonely and neglected when the parents divorce. This is because the parents are often caught up in their own situation and the children tend to feel neglected and forgotten. If one of the parents leave the house then the children may interpret it as their rejection. 6) Watching the parents’ divorce can often make the children distrusting towards others. They do not wish to get hurt and so they are extremely cautious with their feelings. It is difficult for the children to look ahead in life with hope. 7) Studies also indicate that divorce causes children to become rebellious and behavioral deviation and problems are also seen in such children. Article 2: From the past to present, people all over the world have determined to ” get marriage”. Nevertheless, some couples are unable to maintain their relationship so they choose to divorce, which is one of the solutions to cope with problems between a husband and wife. Most people claim to think carefully before they get married, but the divorce rates continue to increase. There are three main causes of divorce: the changing of a man and a woman’s role, stress in modern living and the lack of communication between the married couple. The first significant cause of recent rise in the rates of divorce is that women completely change in roles. In the past, men had to earn the money to afford the expense of family, whereas the woman would do housework. Because of these situations, it is too difficult for most women to separate from their husbands. However, these situations are entirely different today. The equality between men and women in roles are very clear, women can work outside the home to earn money, while men share the household tasks such as cooking, cleaning, washing as well as caring for children. Women are more independent today when it comes to earning money and supporting their cost of living. As a result, the divorce rates seem to have risen with the exchanging of these roles. Another cause to confirm the recent increase in divorce rates is stress in modern living. Many people, who live in other countries, have considerable pressures to earn money. For instance, in Thailand, students generally want to go celebrated universities mostly because it holds a good opportunity to find a job or earn a lot of money. This circumstance not only happens in Thailand, but also occurs in many countries. Some people are on unemployment; consequently, this causes a stress to occur in their family, which may lead to divorce. Some families can earn money, but inadequate for covering their expenses, therefore it is easy to think about divorce. Nevertheless, the rates of unemployment continually increase and as a result, the divorce rates rise. It is no doubt that the stress in modern living may lead to recently increasing divorce rates. The final cause of recent increasing divorce is lack of communication. Due to financial responsibilities in each family, many people are busy. For this reason, they have inadequate time to talk to the problems with their partners, which produces the likelihood of divorce. Some couples are often quiet when they have problems with each other, consequently little problems can expand to huge problems, resulting in divorce. It is quite clear that the more communications that is used, the more the divorce rates reduces. Although, these three causes of the recent rise in divorce rates expressed above, there are also two effects of the recent increase of divorce rates: negative effects and positive effects. For example, the effects of recent enlargement in divorce rates are negative effects. Most couples normally have children when they get married and divorce can have a direct effect on children. Children living in single parent families are more likely to get pregnant as teenagers, drop out of high school, abuse drugs and have aggressively emotional and behavioral problems, which lead to social problems. Some children decide to leave their home when their parents separate from each other, and subsequently they become homeless children. Due to shortage of education, jobs are to land and crime may likely be the result. On the other hand, another effect of the rise in divorce rates is positive. People, who divorce by consent from their partners, want to have better quality of life, since they are unhappy with their spouses. In view of that, with the separation they can work more efficiently. Often their mental condition improves because they are free from their spouses’ murmurs. They not only have more free time to do many things, but also divorce can free a family from the violence of a quarrel between a husband and a wife. In which everyone in family may have better physical and mental health, particularly children. In conclusion, a family is one of the important parts of society, thus many people are aware of the significance of relationship in family. At present, divorce has become the substantial problem because of changing women’s roles, stress in modern living and lack of communication. Nevertheless, there are also the two different ways in effects, which are negative and positive effects. Some couples, which have no children, divorce by consent, therefore divorce should be good solution for couples to deal with this problem. On the other hand, some couples having children in their family should think before they end their marriage in divorce; otherwise innocent children probably become victims for this situation. Although people tend to think carefully before they get into a marriage, the rates of divorce are continuously on the rise. Thesis Statement: There are two effects of the recent increase of divorce rates, that is negative effects and positive effects Main Ideas (Effects on Children): 1) Drop out of high school 2) Alcohol and Substance Abuse 3) Aggressively emotional 4) Behavioral problems