Sexual and desires for fear of seeming unappreciative

Sexual gratification is a key component of romantic relationships. It signifies a couple’s ability to communicate each other’s needs and please one another. Whether satisfaction is high or low, the possibility of improvement and novelty never ceases, but both partners need to be equally invested. When a couple forges intimacy and trust, their sexual activities become more nourishing and gratifying. Although most relationships develop naturally, they will be more sexually gratifying if self-acceptance, safety, and communication are present. Having doubts about one’s appearance hinders the ability to fully enjoy sex with or without another person.

This is an issue many women face in the bedroom since their focus becomes self-centered, regarding whether or not they are good enough to give and receive pleasure. In order to be fully expressive and reach orgasm, a woman needs to respect and be in tune with her body, regardless of its shape or size. Award winning author Mikaya Heart (2008) discusses the importance of self-acceptance in her book The Ultimate Guide to Orgasm for Women. Heart argues that Western culture has placed a fear on most women about looking anything less than perfect (p. 141). Worrying about physical appearance consumes an individual with self-doubt, leading to feelings of worthlessness and decreasing sexual gratification. By choosing to accept and nurture her body, a woman will feel more inclined to relax while maximizing pleasure. Discussing contraception methods can be challenging since it is expected that women take the necessary steps to be responsible, safe, and control pregnancy.

Some women are opposed to using condoms since they interfere with pleasure sensations while other women refuse to go on birth control methods to avoid uncomfortable side effects. This is especially true of women in less developed countries such as Malawi, Africa. The women in a study of rural Malawi confessed that condoms interfered with the amount of pleasure their male partner could feel which in turn negatively affected them as well (John, Babalola, & Chipeta, 2015, p. 100). The study concluded that sexual pleasure is directly linked to the form of contraceptive used and that it is an important element in Malawian couples’ decision making (p.

104). Choosing the right contraceptive method can be difficult since a couple must be in unanimous agreement about what hampers their sexual pleasure, but it is an imperative component of sexual health and safety. Many couples resist sharing their innermost sexual fantasies and desires for fear of seeming unappreciative of their partner or strange. Such intimate thoughts can be shared though honest communication, a form of intimacy that greatly enhances emotional connection. The more connected a couple feels, the better communication and hence sexual gratification.

Sexual fantasies are very common since they nourish foreplay through imagination. A study surveying 178 university students found that about one quarter felt guilty for having sexual fantasies during coitus, and that they were more likely to experience sexual dissatisfaction (Cado & Leitenberg, 1990). Sexual fantasies are not a form of infidelity, they are a submerged wish that would provoke great excitement, novelty, and pleasure if turned into reality by a lover. Through honest communication, a couple may gradually share their personal guide to pleasure. The previous sources are very similar in the fact that they embrace sexual desire as an important and natural process in all romantic relationships. Whether couples embrace their body, use contraception or share their innermost fantasies, they all engage in sexual activities. Another similarity is the pressure women feel to conform to gender norms in order to be sexually appealing.

Women often feel they need to be extremely feminine or sacrifice themselves sexually for their partner, which are societal norms. The last similarity is the availability of contraception worldwide, a notable advancement in birth control methods to suit every woman individually. It is expected that women take the necessary measures to prevent pregnancy, a standard that does not apply as strictly to males. The inequality women face, even to this day, plays a part in their overall sexual gratification. One of the differences from the sources includes the major contrast in cultures. The Western culture adopts a more modern view on sexuality for women, but the Subsaharan culture is rather conservative in love affairs.

Men can have multiple partners while women are expected to remain loyal to only one man. The education level also accounts for better decision making, such as using contraception for STD’s and preventing early pregnancies. Sexual fantasies are a great method to add excitement and novelty to a relationship while remaining faithful, but men in Malawi choose multiple partners over this monogamy reinforcer.